How To Be A Modern Day Sophisticate

“She raised her standards and life started to meet her there.” -Tonya Leigh

When imagining a sophisticated woman, one may imagine someone who is a lady of leisure who travels first class around the world regularly and sips expensive wines while also regularly attending operas or ballets. While this is mostly a stereotype, there is some truth to these characteristics being described as this was typically the archetype of the sophisticated woman as we have envisioned her. While these things sound lovely in theory, most of us are everyday people on an everyday income, but that doesn’t mean that we cannot become a modern-day sophisticate where we can imbue certain sophisticated elements into our life that will provide elegance, culture, and style.  Being sophisticated is about the intention of how you want to live your life in a more refined way where life is elevated to one of gracious living.

Having the intention of being a more sophisticated woman is to make the decision to live everyday life in a finer way and to seek out those things that provides a space of beauty into our surroundings, deportment into our character and elegance into our lifestyle. Cultivating sophistication is a daily practice that can have many benefits to your overall life, even on an average income.  And while we may not all have the budget to travel first class regularly, we can still practice small things in our life to become a more modern-day sophisticate.

 

• Immerse yourself in culture

Once element of sophistication that is available to us all is to immerse yourself in culture.  Whether through art, film, wine, plays, ballets, books, music, history, food, architecture, gardens, etc., there are so many different elements to culture that can be pursued and a great way to practice this is to become more well-rounded with a few of these cultural elements. Visit your local museums, watch some films, visit a local theater, do a wine or food tour, visit a historic estate, book an afternoon tea, or even visit the local library to check out some books on various subjects. Whatever your interest may be follow it and learn more about different cultural subjects to expand your knowledge and critical thinking skills.

• cultivate your signature style

Style is a cornerstone of sophistication and having an elegant signature style will make you stand out in a good way.  How we dress is forever tied to how we are perceived and not only by the public, but by ourselves too.  Take the time to discover what it is that you love to wear and the colors and silhouettes that look best on you. This does not mean that one needs to wear expensive designer outfits, it means to know what you feel your best in and to work to curate your closet to that of a modern-day sophisticated woman. There are so many resources out there between Pinterest and YouTube, so take an interest and work to cultivate your signature style. And if you are looking for a good YouTube channel on this subject, then visit Elegance Feed.

• dress appropriately for the occasion

Sophistication is about having savvy in the real world and one important aspect of this is understanding how to dress appropriately for the occasion.  Whether you are going to work, the symphony, brunch or to a wedding, always dress your best, but also be appropriately dressed for the occasion. Your closet does not need to be full of clothes, but there should be a good variety to accommodate different types of occasions, and many pieces can even be selected to cover a few different occasions as well.  I have many items in my wardrobe that I can wear to work and to run errands, or dresses that I can wear to work and to a wedding or symphony.  But no matter the occasion, learn to dress well and appropriately to cultivate a sophisticated image.

• Travel as much as you can

Traveling can be pricey, especially when done internationally, but whether flying internationally or simply taking a road trip, traveling opens us up to different cultures and ideas as well as the opportunity to visit even more culturally diverse places such as museums, restaurants or historical estates. Traveling gives us the opportunity to experience life in a wonderous way where we get to visit new places and receive new inspirations for our own life.  We become more worldly and attuned to life on a larger scale outside of our everyday life.  Travel experiences stay with us in a way that refines our everyday life and provides a broader view to refine our modern-day sophisticate lifestyle.

• find your signature scent

While at first glance this may seem frivolous and not really needed to be sophisticated, I can attest in my own experience that I have never met a sophisticated woman that did not have her own signature perfume that she wore.  She automatically becomes memorable, lovely and by saying no words at all, shows that she knows herself and makes the effort to smell good and to leave an elegant impression.  It’s a detail that while cannot be seen, is also one that is never forgotten.  Scent is the one sense that is most tied to our memory more than any other, even our sight. And when we have a signature scent, we are instantly recognizable as well as perceived as one who is more sophisticated in details than those who wear nothing at all.

• be an avid reader

Whether your book of choice is a novel, biography, poetry, self-help, style, or a combination of all, reading opens us up to new ideas and inspiration as well as exposes us to words that we may not have heard before and thereby expands our vocabulary as well.  Reading also keeps our minds sharp as we age and also has the benefit of being a well-read person who can hold conversations of interest due to extensive knowledge of many subjects. Being a reader has so many benefits and one that I find most helpful in a modern-day sense is that as a reader one is accustomed to not needing quick form media to be entertained and thus having a good grasp on concentration in everyday life. Reading teaches us patience and to not hurry or rush and a defining characteristic of a sophisticated woman is one who is patient, collected, and can take a beat to gather her thoughts to better articulate her sentences.

• -elevate your sleepwear and lingerie

While we may assume that what we wear to sleep or under our clothes does not matter in terms of sophistication, but the actuality of the matter is that it is a matter of practicing sophistication in all aspects of life, even those that are not seen.  It is an energetic feeling of knowing that you are well turned out even if no one else sees the result. Proper sleepwear and lingerie are a pleasure to wear, and it reinforces a modern-day sophisticate self-image back to us in that details, no matter how small, matters.

• Slow down to a saunter

I touched on this point briefly above with reading, but it is worth reiterating that a sophisticated woman does not rush.  She instead gives herself plenty of time to be where she needs to be. She is calm and collected even when those around her are more frantic.  Sophistication is being discerning, and discerning takes time. Slowing down is not only good for the nerves and our bodily health, but also for our overall life as we learn to take the time needed to accomplish a task or make a decision.  Rushing can leave one’s energy drained and feeling clumsy, but slowing down keeps us poised and feeling more self-controlled in any situation.

• learn the art of discerning for quality

I think we have all heard the adage “quality over quantity” but in order to live out this philosophy one must first learn the art of discerning what quality is.  This skill takes time, trial and error, but it is a skill that leads to having a more sophisticated lifestyle overall.  Choosing quality in every aspect of life leads to having a more quality everyday experience.  Some areas to start learning this skill are in those such as clothing/shoes/accessories, food, entertainment, anything needing to be purchased, places you go and even the people in your life.  Also, price does not always equal quality either.  There are plenty of very expensive things that are of low quality and then there are some truly top-quality things that are inexpensive. That is why when it comes to purchases in particular, one cannot simply default to a price point as a sign of quality. One must instead educate themselves what quality is for a particular product through research and possibly even doing a trial run.  But whether making a purchase, choosing a vacation, picking up a hobby, or simply cooking a meal, being able to discern quality will ensure that refinement takes center stage in life and that being a modern-day sophisticate is well within reach.